The Husband Store...AKA OT Babble Thread!!

Ummm, guys Shard's flavor of MOD SOAP would be green like Irish Spring or something.

Just saying.

Green like the pollen that is blowing out of the pine trees all over the place.

Green like all the plants that are coming to life.

Green like a traffic light.

Green like uuuuuu, mmmmmm, my truck.

The visit to my folks has been pushed back to next weekend for a number of reasons. One reason would be that it will be my birthday weekend. Happy Spawnday to me is coming soon. Yeah, I'm spawn. Deal with it bishes!

*wonders if bishes will warrant a dose of MOD SOAP*

Oh my gosh! You forgot your <font color=green> green mailbox</font color=green>. I'm shocked after you took the time to put that thingie up.

Happy early birthday Shard!!!! I hope you're blessed with many many more happy years in life and on UO. *HUGE MAMA HUGS*

Happy birthday Shard!

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*Eyes Shard*

*Looks at Mod Soap*

It's your birthday soon, I'll let you off the hook. But behave Or I'll get ya!!

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Mama2 has spoken!

Thanx for the well wishes, folks!

Not that I am keeping track or anything ... *snicker*

I keeled the babble thread?!?!


*cries*

Awe....no you didn't m'dear. We're all too busy dying in Moonglow to even post much. Come join us! You can collect death robes with the best of us. *sheepish grin*

Chuck Heston died last night. RIP...

That's sad news to me. There will never be another Moses like Heston and he's one of the very few people in Hollywood who I did admire.

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Chuck Heston died last night. RIP...

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I think it would be hilarious if they put these on the ground for his head stone...



Commence babbling.

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Commence babbling.

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i for when real numbers just piss you off.

Ummmm, babble.

Less is more.....

I reeeally should get over to moonglow and try out that new event...

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 – These men Have Jobs.

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 – These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

“That’s nice,” she thinks, “but I want more.”

So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 – These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.

“Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 – These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help with Housework.

“Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it!”

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 – These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 – You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.



Please Note:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.

The third, fourth, fifth, and six floors have never been visited.

Well @#$%, I applied at that Husband store & they told me I'd be in the basement...now i find out they don't even have a basement. *sighs*

It's only right. Anyone who has met me knows I'm the Queen of Babble. *embarrassed grin*

So I have a question for 'those in the know'. Is Stratics going to stay with this format or will the forums be returned to their regularly scheduled programming? I have to say that I don't mind this now that I've gotten used to it. The only thing I'll miss is the old threads I'd go through when I had nothing to do.

P.S. Ori, do you have the ability to change the title of this thread to "Babble Thread"? If so, go for it lady!

Thanks for the thread.... I needed that laugh!!

Heee Hoooo Haaaa! Hee Hee!

LORD Yalp of Zento, CTDM

LMFAO
Mama you're the best. ill have to come babble with you soon. been a long time.

It will be good to see you come 'babble' with us on Baja! I miss all the fun of just being silly and forgetting about the seriousness of life for a while. And on that note, I'm waiting for some jokes to show up on this thread. Forget about being "PC" and just share some laughs. Come on everyone....I dare ya....I double dog dare ya.

A WOMAN'S POEM
> He didn't like the casserole
> And he didn't like my cake.
> He said my biscuits were too hard...
> Not like his mother used to make.
> I didn't perk the coffee right
> He didn't like the stew,
> I didn't mend his socks
> The way his mother used to do.
> I pondered for an answer
> I was looking for a clue.
> Then I turned around and smacked the **** out of him...
> Like his mother used to do.

OK not so much a joke as a scary realization from a twisted mind. So anyway, Superman had a dog named Krypto with all the same powers. Well, that scares me. Does anyone realize how dangerous that is? If that dog went to sniff someone's crotch he would rip their lungs out of their rear end. And... if he tried to hump someone's leg, he'd put them in traction for a year.

I'm sitting here laughing at both of you guys and your jokes. Good ones! The hubby and I are visiting our two older sons and helping them with home improvements. Since I will be 'UO deprived' for another week, this is the next best thing for humor. And btw... I'm not slacking off right now; I'm waiting for them to return from Lowes so I can start destroying paneling. Ugh! Why would anyone put poo brown paneling over sheetrock? It's just not right.

hey girl, good to see you're still on . Ive been watching my grandbaby, and now another one is on the way, but i still check in from time to time!

Okay, here's an oldie but goodie joke; always good for a chuckle! It's OT-ish, and it's blinkin' pirate humor! ARRRRRR!

A pirate walks into a bar, and the bartender notices something...

Bartender: "Oy, pirate! There's a steering wheel on your penis!?"

Pirate: "Arrrr! I know! It's driving me nuts!"

*waits for the joke to sink in*

Thank you, thank you! *takes a bow*

wait! the topic of this thread is off topic so to be on topic i have to be off it so that means i need to be off off topic which is ontopic but then if im on topic i wont be posting off topic DAMMIT, i guess i just won't post.