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(Player Event) Festival of the Steel Phallus

Discussion in 'UO Baja' started by Xel The Wanderer, Oct 30, 2011.

  1. Xel The Wanderer

    Xel The Wanderer Lore Keeper
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    Hail Folks! *waves*

    Next week marks the unofficial, official Festival of the Steel Phallus event-event-event-vent-*echoes*! While wandering foreign lands, I've come across a very supportive and amazing celebration in which the people of this particular foreign country would celebrate that which can be phallic. It is for one's prosperity and protection.

    You're probably wondering, "Xel, how is it that you have such a shapely arse after all these years???" To that, I answer, "Eat right, get a full night's sleep, exercise and drink a lot of sake." Let me repeat that last phrase, "drink a lot of sake". :shots:

    You may also be wondering, "Xel, how can I participate in this unofficial, official Festival of the Steel Phallus???" To that, I answer, "It's quite easy. While you're in-game, all you have to do is *stand erect* and say the magic phrase 'Cheers to the Steel Phallus!'"

    By inciting this phrase, you will be invoking a power so great, so potent, partly sticky, that you WILL feel its awesome power. Think of it like a Spellweaver's Focus Crystal thingy but multiply its potency by 69.

    My friends, my fellow travelers in Sosaria... To those who farm the fields, to those who work the forge, to those who practice the Arcane, to those who forgot to put their underwear on because you had one too many the other night... I raise my sake bottle to all of you and wish you the very best! "Cheers to the Steel Phallus!"

    This event starts today. :love:
     
  2. EM Godiva

    EM Godiva Journeyman

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    *blinks*
     
  3. Amber Witch

    Amber Witch Slightly Crazed
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    So it shall be! :bowdown:

    Those of us that will be participating in the 2nd Annual Naked Butt Run today will be shouting with the energy of the lowest chakra 'Cheers to the Steel Phallus!'as we run wildly through the streets and dungeons of our beloved Sosaria!

    Any and all are welcome to join in! The more the merrier!! The more, the more power we invoke!!

    We meet at the Luna Bank at 5:00PST today!

    Shoes are optional!

    Insurance is not!


    Cheers to the Steel Phallus!
     
  4. Xel The Wanderer

    Xel The Wanderer Lore Keeper
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    You had me at Naked Butt Run, Amber! I'll be there or should I say I'll be there in my birthday suit! :love:

    This event sounds so beautiful that I'm getting all misty eyed. *sniffs and wipes tears away* Truly, the Festival of the Steel Phallus is all about erecting something that's beyond any of us and leaving a positive stain within everyone's eyes, memories, minds, mouths, and spirits. I truly feel that we'll have a wonderful time and our focus shall be the epitome of community and good times.

    With that said, "HAAAAAAAIL Buckoooooo-oh-oh-oh-oh-*echoes*!"
     
  5. Xel The Wanderer

    Xel The Wanderer Lore Keeper
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    I would personally like to thank everyone who participated in the Butt Naked Run in celebration of the Festival of the Steel Phallus. You have truly exemplified the spirit of Baja in a truly monolithic, engorging manner. Coincidentally, the Butt Naked Run and the Festival of the Steel Phallus took place during the Halloween event. Props to the EM's! I'd say it's a 169% success! Good times. Good blinkin' times. :thumbsup:
     
  6. Mama Faith

    Mama Faith Sage
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    *sniff* I had to miss it due to going out for supper with friends. Granted, they're precious friends but I was really looking forward to this liberating event. I hope you all had fun and loads of laughs. Know I was there with you in spirit. *curtsy*
     
  7. War Wizard

    War Wizard Journeyman
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    If anyone wants to know how to solo this event it's easy..... just finished it. The best template to use, well.... use your imagination.
     
  8. Xel The Wanderer

    Xel The Wanderer Lore Keeper
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    Remember the bracelet with 69 diamonds in it? The one that you so graciously gave me some time ago? I had that bugger in my backpack thinking of you the entire time. You were definitely there with our merry band of Steel Phallus Folks! We had a grand time and all of us did our best to uphold the Spirit of the Phallus. Granted, it's a monolithic phallus, and it takes every single person on Baja to lift it up for all to see. Ride proud fine spirit, ride proud.

    I'm glad you had a night out with your friends and I hope everything was blinkin' fantastic!
     
  9. Lindae

    Lindae Guest

    This very concept is the fruitiest thing I've ever heard of, and I am basically the entire Sosarian gay community encompassed in a single man.
     
  10. Amber Witch

    Amber Witch Slightly Crazed
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    And neither you nor your mate was there. *pouts*
     
  11. Amber Witch

    Amber Witch Slightly Crazed
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    :eek: :bdh: :eek:
     
  12. Amber Witch

    Amber Witch Slightly Crazed
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    Mama, the only thing that could have made it better was to have you there with us running after Xel with his HUGE staff. This was so much fun! I didn't even think of taking any screen shots I was so busy dieing and laughing.

    Next year for sure!
     
  13. Mama Faith

    Mama Faith Sage
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    Xel, it was a fun night with our friends but I would've enjoyed staying home and being with all of you too. Amber's post describing the event had me laughing out loud and I could see it all in my mind's eye. It's things like this that remind us to just enjoy this game and to not take it all so seriously. If it becomes an annual event, I can guarantee that I'll be there with bells on...and little else. *deep curtsy*
     
  14. The Slug

    The Slug Seasoned Veteran
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    Yep, you missed it Mama it was a fun time!

    Sluggy Freelance, Butt Naked Dungeon Runner, Protector of the Ferret, and Knight of the Tiny Slug Phallus at your service :bowdown:
     
  15. Annalise

    Annalise Guest

    I hadn't even read the forums that day, just happened upon Luna and got drawn into the festivities!

    Everyone was so exuberant and cheerful, I just stripped down and joined in. :)
    Thanks for taking me along, it was a lot of fun!
     
  16. Xel The Wanderer

    Xel The Wanderer Lore Keeper
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    You know, the Butt Naked Run, Festival of the Steel Phallus, and the Halloween EM Event is huge success. I'm definitely going to keep the tradition alive, but there's no way I could've done this without the help of the citizens of Baja because without you, the Steel Phallus would remain impotent and no one wants that.

    I've engraved one of my staffs to read, "Cheers to the Steel Phallus", which I was holding up (whilst naked) during the event. It is a beacon of hope for those who've lost hope and for those who've fallen into the monotony of monotonous undertones. *holds his big staff up*

    Cheers to the Steel Phallus and more importantly, FOR BAJAAAAA!!! HUZZAH!!! SO SAY WE ALL!!!
     
  17. did anyone find my undies....I lost them during the butt run, i've looked everywhere.....oh my
     
  18. Amber Witch

    Amber Witch Slightly Crazed
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    *Looks at Sluggy*
     
  19. Lindae

    Lindae Guest

    ...I just read that as "did anyone find my uncles".
     
  20. RawHeadRex

    RawHeadRex Slightly Crazed
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    steel what ?

    if that was someones character name it would have been changed by a GM to Carebear.
     
  21. Xel The Wanderer

    Xel The Wanderer Lore Keeper
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    I bet it's in some player's Rares Museum by now. Manticore, Dungeon Queen, JINX, et. al., give the woman her tighty whities back. :love: