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I lost my wife last Saturday

Discussion in 'UHall' started by Trebr Drab, Jul 26, 2010.

  1. Trebr Drab

    Trebr Drab Guest

    My wife passed away Saturday evening. It was sudden, a stroke, I think.

    She was the most wonderful wife and mother anyone could ever ask for. I loved her so very much. Everything about her, her crafts, the way she tried so hard at everything she did, the way she cared so much for people, her generosity, her sense of humor, all the little things.

    I just got done going through her contact lists and e-mails with friends and informing them. I'm crying, my heart hurts badly. I have a few friends in UO, and I just wanted to let you know.
     
  2. kelmo

    kelmo Old and in the way
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    The community mourns with you. I have no words... *holds*
     
  3. Zurhet Pebblethief

    Zurhet Pebblethief Journeyman
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    I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you can find some peace in the days and weeks to come.
     
  4. ohmyGED

    ohmyGED Visitor

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    I don't know you personally but have seen you around the forums. I'm deeply sorry for your loss.
     
  5. Uriah Heep

    Uriah Heep Crazed Zealot
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    What Kelmo said.
    When all is said and done here, we are a family.
    We feel your loss.
     
  6. Petra Fyde

    Petra Fyde Peerless Chatterbox
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    My sympathies and condolences. If we can help in any way, we'll be here.
     
  7. I can't express my sadness for your loss in text, but you are in my prayers.
     
  8. Shelleybean

    Shelleybean Certifiable
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    I'm terribly sorry for your loss.
     
  9. Lord Chaos

    Lord Chaos Always Present
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    Having been there myself, I feel for your loss. :( I am so sorry, nothing can ever mend that wound and nothing will ever be the same.

    Again, I am truly sorry for your loss.
     
  10. Setnaffa

    Setnaffa Certifiable
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    Wow....

    That is truly sad. I don't know how to respond except to pass on my heart-felt condolences.
     
  11. Storm

    Storm UO Forum Moderator
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    I am at a loss for words my condolences to you and your family!
     
  12. popps

    popps Always Present
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    I am sorry for your loss. My sympathies and condolences.
     
  13. WarderDragon

    WarderDragon Babbling Loonie
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    You have my condolences, Trebr.

    I know it is no comfort but I'll be saying a prayer for you and your family.
     
  14. DevilsOwn

    DevilsOwn Stratics Legend
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    Condolences to your and yours, Trebr
     
  15. The_Traveler

    The_Traveler Guest

    I can't imagine the suffering you are going through.
    My sympathies.
     
  16. Nine Dark Moons

    Nine Dark Moons Certifiable
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    That is such sad news :( I am so sorry to hear of her passing. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
     
  17. Viper09

    Viper09 Grand Poobah
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    That is horrible news. I can't imagine what you are feeling. You have my deepest sympathies. :(
     
  18. Jesara

    Jesara Guest

    Oh Trebr, I am so sorry to hear this. We often forget that life can turn upside down in one minute. My prayers are with you and yours to help you through the difficult times coming up.
     
  19. uorichreallifepoor

    uorichreallifepoor Journeyman
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    I am so sorry for you loss.When i read stuff like this it makes me want to hold my wife just a little closer, and kiss my kids a little more than i normally do.I pray you find peace
     
  20. Dryzzid of Atlantic

    Dryzzid of Atlantic Journeyman
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    You have my sincerest condolences for your loss.
     
  21. Evlar

    Evlar Guest

    Deeply sorry to hear of your loss Trebr.

    Nothing can replace the loss, but nothing can take away all the fond memories either.
     
  22. DenAlton036

    DenAlton036 Guest

    My wife and I extend our thoughts and prayers.. thinking of you and your family.

    DenAlton, GL
     
  23. MalagAste

    MalagAste Belaern d'Zhaunil
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    Trebr,

    Very sorry to hear of your loss. Know you will be in my prayers. I know there are no words that might comfort you now, but do try to take comfort in knowing that you are in our thoughts and our hearts.

    May each day bring you healing comfort and each memory you have in the next few months, know that soon they will bring a sense of joy as you remember she is forever near as her memory will always be in your heart.

    *hugs* Take care Trebr and know your friends are with you if not in body in thought.
     
  24. Flutter

    Flutter Always Present
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    I am very sorry for your loss.
     
  25. Martyna Zmuir

    Martyna Zmuir Crazed Zealot

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    My condolences for your loss, Trebr. *hugs*
     
  26. thenow

    thenow Guest

    My thoughts, love and prayer are with you and all those around you.
    A deep sadness of the soul.
    A butterfly in the sky
    tears so much, eyes will never dry.
    Love so great , time can never hide.
    Love is the light in eternity and eternal is the soul.
    Love is the light in heaven,
    her love, her soul will help heaven shine more.


    My wife and I are soul mates too. I feel for you immensely. I almost put my wife through the same a number months ago. My only thought was not of moving on from this realm but how my wife would be after I went. I'm sure your wife is worried for you all and will watch over you.
     
  27. canary

    canary Guest

    So sorry, Trebr. My condolences.
     
  28. phantus

    phantus Stratics Legend
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    Strength is often found in all those around you at these times but its up to you to use and spare it as is needed. For this reason I wish upon you strength sir.
     
  29. weins201

    weins201 Certifiable
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    My deepest sympathy for your loss

    May you strive through troubled times and persevere.

    I know nothing can be said to bring her back or quell the lose.

    My thoughts, prayers and wishes go with you.
     
  30. Llewen

    Llewen Grand Inquisitor
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    Re: My deepest sympathy for your loss

    You probably have more friends here than you realize Trebr, and some who have travelled the road you are travelling now. May you find strength in your friends wherever you find them.
     
  31. Trebr Drab

    Trebr Drab Guest

    Thank you all.

    It's such a small seeming thing, but your condolences truly do help. We're people, we need each other. A lot more than we realize most of the time.

    I'll never forget many things, but one of them is when I met her. I was in hell then too. The girl I would have married was killed by her ex husband so she couldn't be with another. I couldn't cope. I lost my job. I had quite a bit of money, and spent the next few years wading through it drinking. Getting drunk every night to try to stem the pain, falling asleep every night crying and praying to God to help me, to send me someone. But I knew I was a wreck, I didn't care about anything. I was running out of money, and I asked God "what next? Do I just die? I think that's alright with me."

    I had friends, two brothers, who owned a tavern where I drank most of my booze. They helped me as much as they could. Put me to work on roofing jobs and bartending. Tried to keep me sober and get me going. It worked a little, but I would just fall back into it. Then one day, one of the brothers' girlfriend was in there eating lunch with a friend who worked with her. I just came in, ordered a drink, and saw this friend's girlfriend, and the girl next to her looking the other way. We were introduced, and when she looked around at me, I knew. Right then, my heart pounded and I knew. But I was scared, and I just said my hello and went into another room to see some other friends and have some more booze. That night, for the first night in years, I didn't get totally wasted. I went home early, asking God if this is for real, "is this it, after all this time?" And the next day, she was there again with the friends girlfriend for lunch. And my heart leaped with joy, I somehow knew she was there for me. So I asked her if she wanted to go out with a bum like me, and she said yes. And we never looked back. We both knew. It was just so natural.

    And the years went by, and I had 26 years of marriage, raising two kids, going places and doing things together. So many good memories. So I came into it in hell, and now find myself in hell again. But this time, I'm stronger because of her. It hurts, and it's hell, but this time I will do it right. This time I will carry on the right way, do everything as best I can, try as hard as I can. Like she always did. And I have my kids, her kids, and I'll make them, and her, proud of me. This time, through all this hurt and pain, despite it all and because of it all, I am thankful for what God gave me. This time, I go on the right way.

    With so many people walking up to me, calling me, offering condolences and help, I thank them politely. I cry a little, and tell them I appreciate it so much and give hugs and handshakes. And there's so many people. Everybody liked her. And I will do this right. For her memory, for my kids, and for me, I'll carry on like you should carry on.

    Thank you all again, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.
     
  32. I am so sorry...
     
  33. Schuyler Bain

    Schuyler Bain Lore Master
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    Peace be with you and your family during this difficult time.
     
  34. Amber Witch

    Amber Witch Slightly Crazed
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    Trebr, My heart goes out to you and your kids. *hugs*
     
  35. Trebr,
    I am so very sad for you and your family's loss. My prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time.
     
  36. Mama Faith

    Mama Faith Sage
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    My heart ached and my eyes burned as I read your words about the loss of your wife. Know that I'll be praying you find peace in the days to come. "When a loved one becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure". I have no doubt you'll forever treasure the beautiful memories you created with your wife of 26 years. May God bless you and comfort you in the days to come.
     
  37. Picus of Napa

    Picus of Napa Slightly Crazed
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    Sorry for your loss.
     
  38. five oclock

    five oclock Guest

    Our prayers are with you and your family....
     
  39. aoLOLita

    aoLOLita Sage
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    Please accept my condolences ...
     
  40. Mapper

    Mapper Crazed Zealot
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    So sorry for you loss, I just cannot think of any words to say, But I want you to know you and your family are in my thoughts.
     
  41. I am deeply sorry for your loss. Your UO friends will provide much solace. Although it will never leave, in time the pain will lessen; trust me on this. Talk about your wife with anyone who will listen and share your memories. Sincere warm thoughts to you and your family.
     
  42. Black Sun

    Black Sun Grand Poobah
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    I've been staring at this screen for nearly 5 minutes now trying to figure out the right words to type. I really don't think there are any.

    I can't imagine the loss you're feeling right now.
    I'm so sorry.
     
  43. Theo_GL

    Theo_GL Grand Poobah
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    Very sad news indeed....
     
  44. Lorax_Pacific

    Lorax_Pacific Lore Master
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    Sorry for the loss. Take care of yourself and get together with friends and family to talk about her as a group or as two separate groups. It really helps.

    -Lorax
     
  45. kelmo

    kelmo Old and in the way
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    This is a simple and strait forward message from the staff. Do not troll this thread. I am sorry I have to say that... I have seen it happen. Any that do will receive the harshest penalty we have to deliver.
     
  46. Lady_Rachel

    Lady_Rachel Lore Keeper
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    I am so sorry for your loss Trebr.


    *hugs*
     
  47. watchertoo

    watchertoo Sage
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    Trebr... there are no words... just remember your UO family is here. Lean on us, take whatever strength you can from us.
     
  48. Snakeman

    Snakeman UO Forum Moderator
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    So sorry Trebr, my sincerest condolences & prayers for you & your family. I know if I lost my wife of 29 yrs what it would mean to me, so I can imagine your pain. Be strong.
     
  49. Nok

    Nok Lore Master
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    Best wishes and condolences to you & yours Trebr.

    "When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure." -Author Unknown. Find your treasures remembered and shared... and embrace them.
     
  50. RaDian FlGith

    RaDian FlGith Babbling Loonie
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    Treb,

    I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss. I can only just begin to fathom the pain you must be going through, but reading the story of how you met, I have to say, that she had such a profound effect on your life is a very good thing, and I am certain you have years of great memories to keep her close to your heart.

    You're definitely in my thoughts, and if you need a virtual ear, I'm a couple of clicks away. They say that time heals all wounds, but those like these linger forever. However, it's a good thing... I think the influence she had in life will continue on, and you'll be a living testament to the good that she did in life.

    Take care of yourself, bud. As others have said, you're not alone, so reach out if you need to.