I gave away my favorite things to some of my favorite people. I sold off the rest of four plus years of pernicious collecting at Grond’s place in Luna and stuffed my bank box obscenely full (just in case). Then I loaded whatever was left in the chitonous wing-pocket of SpearmintCup, and there was only one thing left to do…go play a final round of UO Oblivious, The Game Show You Don’t Know You’re Playing. Obviously. My friend Kwuteg Ulot and I took about 100 dumb pills apiece and we started wandering the land, having arguments about where to get an ostard, what a bloodmoss does, and whether or not you can dig up treasure using a map that says, “Completed by Dingo.” We dragged passers by into our newbish fussings, and anyone who stopped long enough to help us and correctly answer some questions got the first thing I could grab out of the beetle. We hit moongates, popular vendor shops, the less populated banks, and even trit-trotted like gormless ducklings into Destard. We found my favorite contestant at Skara Brae Bank. He recognized me while Kwu and I stood blathering about how much gold a level 3 T-Map might yield. “Pluffy, is that you? I heard you quit,” he said. “I don’t know?” I said. “I just got this account off ebay today?” And so he stood there endlessly answering questions, helping out the newbies while Kwu and I acted so dumb we were practically drooling onto our boots. And yet he stayed patiently with us, explaining and explaining, trying to open up this amazing world for us. He’s what makes UO great. At last the beetle was empty and Kwuteg and I headed over to Glow to drop The Plush (my L-Shaped house) to the ground. I hit DEMOLISH and watched as the house dropped but the deco remained, sitting out on the grass. It looked like a pink-obsessed lawn-art fairy did a drive-by puking. “That’s that!” I said. “Yep,” said Kwu, And we logged off right there, with the everlasting and eternally irritating Mongbat spawn nibbling fiercely at our heels. And so I ‘spose really the only thing left to say is this: So long. And thanks for all the fish.