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(OT) Why am I Cursed?

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Ludes, Nov 11, 2011.

  1. Ludes

    Ludes Babbling Loonie
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    Background: In the area I live there is a groundskeeper/maintenance man.. he plows when it snows.. mowes grass in common areas. Shovels walks.. And does odd jobs for anyone thats asks for almost no pay. His name is Shawn.
    So about 6 weeks back Shawn comes to my house and tells me.. somebody down the way abandoned 2 fish and a little orange kitten. Crib is being re-posessed blah blah blah.
    He mentions fish will be flushed.. and animal control will be there later to take the cat and euthanize it according to state law. (strays or animals without documentation are automatically executed here in Colorado).

    Well I musta been stoned but I went there with Shawn and took both fish and the kitten back to my house. the fish were both basically colorless, starved to bones.. and swimming in less than two inches of water. the kitten was scared, lonely, starved and dehydrated.. he had drunk the toilet dry before Shawn found him. So Shawn and myself hustle the trio back to my house cause like I said I was drunk and stoned.

    Current Day: Six weeks later.. Fish have new tanks.. two. One was a Beta and one was a Koi .. so no mixing them.
    But no worries I kinda like the way the fishtanks fit in with my trees and fountain.

    HOWEVER!! Gargles (as we named him) After about a week started giving Mrs. Speckleworth (My owner) grief.. he wanted to play chase.. wrestle.. and practice coitus..

    Mrs. Speckleworth.. being eight and a half years old.. set in her ways.. and used to our mutually enjoyed solitude.. well lets just say : Objected.

    So off Gargles went to the vet.. I'm trying to find him a home so I figured hey.. Vet checkup.. Shots.. and neutering, easier to find him a home with all that documented and paid for right?
    Nobodies adopted him yet.

    He chews on my plants.. unrolls my toilet paper.. empties my trash cans.. gnaws on my shoes.. He STILL wants to play chase and wrestle with my boss. (at least he's not trying to mount her anymore, she almost killed him the first time).. I'm no longer allowed to stack coins on the coffee table. In fact almost nothing is allowed on the coffee table.

    This all started with me (in an altered state) thinking I was being the GOOD person and SAVING an innocent.

    I'm cursed.. The saying "No Good Deed goes Unpunished" must have my picture next to it.

    Maybe someone here will take him..

    [​IMG]

    Uploaded with ImageShack.us

    P.S. Yes I'll cover his plane ticket!
     
  2. kulder

    kulder Lore Keeper
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    Looks like my old cat Morris destroyed everything and treid to own everything but after awhile settled down,had him almost 10 years :sad3: maybe Gargles is a reincarnation (and no I wont adopt him)
     
  3. Doubleplay

    Doubleplay Lore Keeper
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    Looks like you did a good job rehabilitating the cat. Have you considered doing the same for that poor plant?
     
  4. Larisa

    Larisa Reporting Manager
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    He'll outgrow it. He's just VERY happy to have a home where he knows he's loved and appreciated.

    take good care of him, love him, cuddle him...put up with his *baby*behaviors and it will eventually go away and you'll end up with a very loving, very cute, very loyal companion, guranteed :)
     
  5. Felonious Monk

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  6. Ludes

    Ludes Babbling Loonie
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    Funny you mention that plant.. that is one of last summers window tomatoes.. As you probably know tomatoes die after bearing fruit.. fior some reason this one doesn't want to die so I water it a little and leave it.

    But it's an strange plant.. most tomatoes die after fruiting.

    And Larisa.. yes he's happy but remember I have an OWNER.. it's not my call..

    See Ludes's owner below.

    [​IMG]

    Uploaded with ImageShack.us

    Umm I'm sorry.. WHO's Chair?
     
  7. Uvtha

    Uvtha Grand Poobah
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    I have a feral kitten that we took in because he needed medication after sending him off to the local spay/neuter release program, and I felt bad about sending him back out into the world after he was done with his medicine (as I grudgingly knew i would when I took him in), so he became our pet, and he is also a complete loony pain in the butt.

    Chews plants, attacks everyone in the house including my poor 13 year old dog, unspools tp, goes anywhere hes not supposed to, nurses on blankets...

    So I feel your pain. And I'm not even a cat person at all either never had or wanted one. He's getting more tolerable as time goes by, but FAR too slowly. :p
     
  8. Ludes

    Ludes Babbling Loonie
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    K I'll throw in tem million gold on Catskills for anyone that takes him..
     
  9. Larisa

    Larisa Reporting Manager
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    Ohhh is that a nasty look! LOL

    You sure do have an owner my goodness! Cute as a button though but I see that attitude ;)

    I have one of those as well but he's just a baby, turned a year old this past October but the attitude on him is huge lol.
     
  10. Faeryl

    Faeryl Babbling Loonie
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    My mom brought a feral Manx kitten home a few years ago... He was aptly named 'Fury'. (I have the scars on my hands and forearms to prove it!) Tiny little thing, but nasty. We had to put a bell on his collar so we could hear him coming and try to escape before he could bite our ankles. (And heaven forbid he got ahold of my rabbit's foot keychain o.0)

    Unfortunately, after about a year and a half, we had to euthanize him because he had our other cat, Riven, and all four of our (approx) 50 pound Aussies and even the family terrified of him.
     
  11. MalagAste

    MalagAste Belaern d'Zhaunil
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    Nothing could have prepared me for my first "kitten". Her name "Precious"... Precious she was NOT. I never saw her for the first 2 weeks of her "coming home"... she hid out under our bed. I was about 6 or 7 months pregnant at the time and there was NO WAY I was climbing down there. I got her to help the "mouse" population in the little trailer we were in. She was a farm kitten so humans were "tolerated" as food bearers nothing more.

    One evening about 2 weeks after her "arrival"... I woke to excruciating pain in my feet, only to find my "Precious" pouncing happily on my poor toes. The more my feet moved in effort to get away the more viciously she pounced.

    I tried to pet her... and she ran for cover. Each night I heard her crying trying to find her "mom" and the rest of the kittens she knew I supposed. So I began to imitate her cries. She eventually came to investigate my distress. After several days of coaxing I finally managed to get her to come out from under my bed and tolerate my presence in the room. I even got her to play a few games of fetch with tossed cigarette pack wrappers. She enjoyed this game.

    After several weeks we moved into a more roomy place and my son was born. I brought him home somewhat worried about how "Precious" would accept this new "human"... I brought his little car seat in and set it down on the floor and called her over. She knew something was up so she came cautiously over and walked up my back and looked down on the little addition from the high vantage of my shoulder. She let out a stern "Hiss and growl" as she glared at the sleeping child.

    I backhanded her and knocked her a few feet behind me. I looked her right in the eyes and told her "Now listen here Missy! If it comes down to a choice between you and him... You lose. Harm one hair on his head and you'll find yourself living outside permanently!" I have no idea if it was the tone of my voice or the backhand that checked her little attitude or changed her heart... But from that day forward she was my Son's protector.

    She slept at the foot of his crib watching his every sleeping move. Any stir from him or if he so much as batted his eyes and it brought her to me. She'd pounce on my chest and glare at me with a great bit "MEOW!" This was her cluing me in that the baby might cry and I was to "Fix it!".

    She would start calling me if I left him in his room with the baby monitor and went to do laundry or anything I knew the instant he was awake... I could hear her calling me over the monitor. The older he got the more involved he became with her. When he would sit in his highchair for meals he wouldn't eat whatever I tried to feed him unless "Precious" approved it first. I had to give her the lid of the jar and he'd watch closely to see if she ate it. If she turned her nose so would he. Thankfully she loved most all baby foods... Save the sweet potatoes... she hated them.

    Growing up more he started to crawl. She found this fascinating... She would encourage him to crawl by sitting just out of reach and then moving a bit each time he came to get her.

    It wasn't until he began to walk really well that they finally quit being friends. She got a bit tired of him yanking her from the windowsills by her tail... or plopping onto her when she was trying to soak up some "rays" in the sun. But never once did she claw him... She would slap him sometimes with her paws but she never used her claws on him... Not like she did to older humans to "mistakenly" tried to do something terrible like pet her. Not until the day he kept chasing her around and around the house... I warned him many times and so did she... She slapped him... Hissed at him... even gave her nasty "Growl"... but he would NOT listen. I told him "Kitty does NOT want to play she wants you to leave her alone... she's going to get mad and scratch." But he didn't listen. Finally he cornered her in the bathroom and she let him have it... She clawed him... with one little claw right on his arm.

    "Kitty SCATCH!" He cried. "Yes I told you she would." Was all I said. From then on he left her alone and she left him alone. All she need do was hiss and he'd run away.

    But she had more important things to do that to train a human kitten.


    I've had several kitties since but none so "Precious". No I won't take this one either... Sorry. Besides I live half way across the country from you!

    I love kitties... but I'm starting to think when I'm done with the one I've got now... I think I'm done with pets.

    Enjoy it. Each pet leaves a lasting memory that is well worth it.
     
  12. kelmo

    kelmo Old and in the way
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    He is a fine looking orange cat. I had one that looked simular... I did not get him fixed though. I was foolish I know. He turned into zombie tom cat.

    No fish pics?

    Ohh... I am moving this to off topic. I will leave a redirect for all pet lovers though.

    P.S. I have a three legged cat. Just saying.
     
  13. old gypsy

    old gypsy Grand Poobah
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    He's so pretty. Looks a lot like my cat. He'll mellow with age. Mine, when a kitten, used my legs as scratching poles (he'd dig in his claws and shinny up them... oh, did that hurt!) He's about nine years old now, and much sweeter. :)
     
  14. Sevin0oo0

    Sevin0oo0 Guest

    free shipping on those leftovers?
    sorry, already got a semi-short hair cat - PURRFECT - even gently moves the sheers out of the way to see out the window, freezes in place when you say stop, loves dogs, lap kat, sleeps on his back, only bad habit: licks up the water in the shower bottom. damaged voice box so extremely quiet
     
  15. Sevin0oo0

    Sevin0oo0 Guest

    aaw, it was UO related - 10mil gold
     
  16. Lady Storm

    Lady Storm Crazed Zealot
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    AWW you got a owner who needs a understudy. Tell her he is her assistant.

    My Oscar was found at the aspca here in the medical ward. he was turned in by the breeder and placed up for adoption. Only he had a fox tail in his paw that festered up and poped mid way through the holding period they had him on. I had lost the year prior my darling JR. The most intelegent cat you would ever want to meet. He passed away from feline lukemia at age 12. I was heart broken as was my whole family. Hubby said lets wait a few before we get a new pet. I missed JR and didnt want no one but him. So it was ok. Over a year had passed and hubby said ok time to get new pet so ground rules were set. rule 1: had to be a rescue
    Rule 2: Had to be a cat that was house broken Rule 3: must get aproval from the Queen(my mother in law) So every weekend Id take my son off to the shelter to see what they had... I was thinking kitten.... but was the wrong time of year for many of hte little ones to pop up so a few weeks went by and then one weekend my son gave me a holler from the med ward where he saw more cages to look at. Down on the bottom row sitting there like a lost soul was Oscar.
    His poor paw was wraped up and he was a ball of fluffy black hair. Vet said he was up that monday for adoption. His Glowing orange eyes and black fur was all a witch could ask for in a fermilar! He was sooo hansome. I went home and told hubby. I guess I droned on so much over this baby my hubby melted on sunday night and said ok go get our refugee. I was 15 minutes late for opening of the shelter due to traffic i was having a sinking heart that someone else would take my new baby before he knew he was owned by me! But the Gods were looking out and there sitting as if he was waitin for me was Oscar. The most loving and cuddly cat you ever met. Hubby took to him and told him we get him the best lawyer! (he wasa persian) for that mac truck that hit him. hehe He made all the rules and then some. He charmed Queen mum, and King too. Oh he got his name from my hubby who was ill and watching of all things sesame street and the two n two hit hubby. Oscar was named after oscar the grouch. All that fur around his head was kinda lookng just like the character...
    Oscar was a prince among cats. He was human intelegent, understood your every word and had a way of making you feel welcome in our home. One of the best sou chefs I will ever have too!
    Oscar died in 2007 and I miss my baby so very much. He was 15 years old.

    He is a baby Ludes, talk to him. They are not stupid. He had a hard life at first he has issues give him love and some attention. Your boss needs an assistant in her dutys around the house.
    (get some cat nip and toys and let even the boss get high on some nip)
    You did a noble and good deed kiddo I am proud of you for helping him out. Now give him the chance to pay you back.
     
  17. Falon of Eldor

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    [​IMG]

    This is Zak. A baby stray who me and my 10 yo cat, lucky, heard crying outside every night for a week last October. Friday night came and I decided to put some food out. Saturday morning go to start the car and hear baby kitten crying, turn off engine, open hood and there is the baby. Take it to the vet. 8 weeks old, undernourished, a few worms and fleas. Get worm medicine for lucky and the new baby.

    First 3 months was hell. Shaken baby syndrome (only twice) when he was driving me and lucky out of our minds. Midnights on the computer looking up the humane society swearing Zak was going to be dropped off in the morning.

    *sighs deeply*

    Now one year later , he is the best thing to ever have happend to us. YEs he is still the "baby" and is spoilt and pampered. Yes he is very possessive and still "talks" all the time. He is night and day different from lucky.

    They now get along (helped i think that they were both males, and yes, both got snipped when little). They even come to each others rescue when in distress.

    Patience, Ludes.

    He will turn out to be your very best bud. And "she who must be obeyed" will soon straighten him out as well. I would get physically pained when zak and lucky would fight...but they do have to work things out for themselves.

    And this is lucky:

    [​IMG]

    PS - Forgot...Zak tripped me on the stairs and I sprained my ankle...he steals everything and hides the loot, he destroys rolls of tp and papertowels...he has lots of stuffed animal babies that he plays with...anytime i am on the phone he is like a two year old and tries to get my attention by being naughty and mimicing me by talking the whole time i am talking...etc etc etc Baggage...we all got it!
     
  18. Fridgster

    Fridgster Lore Master
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    I too have adopted a stray. His name is Oscar and for the first few months my owner(s) were not happy at all. Them being female and he being male and all. However over time they did get used to him and he is now just part of the family. Kinda the red headed step child but still loved.

    My first cat woody growing up had three legs... and as an odd twist of fate my 3rd grade pen pal had a 3 legged dog.
     
  19. Uvtha

    Uvtha Grand Poobah
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    Our feral kitty isnt anything like that really. Hes just a pain in the butt. He will also cuddle up, and he sleeps on my bed with me.

    I think a lot of it is just kitten energy, but from someone who never owned a cat and never planed to its a bit overwhelming at times heh.

    We actually feed the other feral cats we had spayed that live in an abandoned shed in our yard, and some of them are very friendly and like to be petted.
     
  20. Ludes

    Ludes Babbling Loonie
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    Wow this thread turned out way cooler than I expected..

    And the fact that he's not the first to ever destroy a weeks worth of toilet paper, prolly saved his ass.. Mrs. Speckleworth ain't gonna like it but oh well. I guess I can call it normal red headed cat behaviour..

    I'll occasionally throw a picture up so anyone who's interested can keep track of him.

    P.S. So Kelmo.. how'd your cat lose a leg?
     
  21. Ludes

    Ludes Babbling Loonie
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    Oh and yeah the fish are doing fine as well.. But I have trouble taking pictures of them.. they absolutely refuse to pose.. and my camera ain't all that great so i mostly get too much glare off the tank..

    But I keep trying.. here's one that turned out ok.. you can actually see her..

    The beta's tank is plexiglass so it's harder.. I'll get one tomorrow when the light is better.

    [​IMG]

    Uploaded with ImageShack.us
     
  22. Sevin0oo0

    Sevin0oo0 Guest

    for those with Inside-Only cats, do you ever get a rears declaw?
     
  23. Ludes

    Ludes Babbling Loonie
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    I never have.. There are plenty of scratching posts around the place.. I use a squirt bottle to train them if they use claws on bad things..(like speakers).
     
  24. MalagAste

    MalagAste Belaern d'Zhaunil
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    Never had any cat declawed. I have had 2 declawed cats but they came that way... only the fronts though.

    As for "adoptee's".... I've had a few but the best ones were "Darth Maul(Otherwise referred to as Darathy) and Obi Wan (known as Obe's)"

    My daughter volunteered for quite awhile at the local "Paws" shelter. She often walked the dogs and tended the cats... each week BEGGING for me to come and look at the "new arrivals".... But I had specifics for a new cat that we would get... It couldn't be BLACK... because I'd always had black cats and I wanted something "new" .... I also wanted a bright blue eyed cat... It had to be "nice"... which meant you had to be able to pick it up... hold it like a baby on it's back... you had to be able to "look" at each claw on each paw without the cat "freaking out" about it... this meant that no matter what a kid might do the cat would be "ok" with it. And it had to want to play... regardless of who you were.

    So each week we'd wind up at the "Paws" and look at all the kitties... most of them were quickly rejected since you couldn't even pick them up... without causing a panic.

    After about 3 or 4 months my Daughter became totally desperate for a pet... but I was sticking to my guns! Then they came... two kittens one was soooo pretty.... he was Nermal cute! Gray and black swirls on the sides.... and super cute... But he had the normal everyday yellow ocher eyes... with a bit of green but mostly the blah yellow... but geez he was cute.... so I tested him.... He passed every test with flying colors...

    She begged and begged PLEASE Mom! I melted... Fine. "We'll take this one!" I announced reluctantly.

    The kind woman running the shelter looked at me... "And separate him from his brother? They were found together you know... They've been together their whole lives."

    I looked at the black thing in the cage and let out a long sigh... "Well... will you toss him in for free?"....

    "Tell you what you can have him for half price... and I'll give you a voucher to get them both neutered." She offered.

    "Fine... I suppose." I looked at my daughter and said.... "Ok we'll get them both but this one is mine!" I said proudly cuddling my new pretty kitty. "You and your brother can have the black one."

    So home we went with out new kitties.

    Wouldn't you know it though the "Pretty" kitty wouldn't have anything to do with me! However the black one followed me everywhere... he totally loved me.

    Over time we found that "Obes" was your typical cat... He expected regular feedings, pettings, and expected you to play with him when HE demanded. However "Darathy" became more and more whitty with time. He began to learn that if he wanted any of this human attention he'd have to get it by other means.... he wasn't cute enough to "steal the show".... like his brother... so he devised other means.

    He learned many "Tricks" over time. He shook hands... Gave high Fives, Would come if you called and all you had to do was snap your fingers and point where you wanted him to be and he'd happily jump right up there and sit down... He'd "Talk" when you asked... He even became good at waking my daughter for me..... I once looked at him and said "Darathy..... go in there and get her up for me." And to my amazement he did.... went right into her room and pounced on her meowing loudly till she got up.

    Darth quickly became my kitty and performed regularly for all our guests... and loved the attention. Obes still stole the show though with his super cuteness...

    I'll see if I can't find pictures to add...
     
  25. Blaeke

    Blaeke Journeyman
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    Re: (OT) Why am I Cursed? Yo, call it family!

    BRAVO Ludes! You're a good hearted mellow dude (we won't tell anyone) by taking in Gargles like you did. Gargles will be much more reasonable now that his hormones have been adjusted and as he continues to become further acclimated to his new abode.

    I adopted a 4 month old feral calico who was pre-named Mia. Her name now is Mia Feral, of course, but she has to be the smartest feline I've had to date. Her foster mother somehow taught her that the dining room table is off limits, so that is great. And the spray bottle does work like a charm, but it's now gotten to the point where I can make eye contact with her and wag my finger while saying "No no no..." and she backs away guiltily and sometimes even gets guilt ridden hickups. She has to be part dog with this obvious conscience. She's 1 1/2 now and is sweeter and better behaved everyday. I think she is thankful, just as Gargles is, that she has a home and giant human slave (that would be me.) But she's a frickin' joy. My older cat, Rex, who is sure there is a Rex hunter hiding in every shadow and room as he prowls to a new location with my small apartment, has grown to love her. They are now best friends. They often cat bathe each other's faces and share their warmth sleeping beside each other.

    Even though you're a mildly buzzed solitudinal (yep, making up a word) kind of guy, I think you're a great kitty, plant and fish daddy. Kudos to you!

    Here's Mia when she was new to my home... yes I was helping her get crazy...
    [​IMG]

    And here's Mia and Rex her first night here... he wasn't terribly pleased when she decided to lounge with him so soon, but maybe that's a timid guy thing.
    [​IMG]
     
  26. Blaeke

    Blaeke Journeyman
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    You, Falon, are delightfully funny! I LMAO on the two quotes above. Especially the "shaken baby syndrome!":lol:

    Thank you for being another excellent cat slave. :mf_prop: