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[Stealing] PvP Theft Story of the Month

Discussion in 'UO Crime' started by Nexus, Jan 15, 2013.

  1. Nexus

    Nexus Site Support
    Administrator Professional Governor Wiki Moderator Stratics Veteran Stratics Legend Campaign Patron

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    With the Merger we're going to do something new. Thief of the Month is being overhauled. Now it will require screenshots and a Story format. Additionally their will be a separate Thief of the Month for PvE and PvP to reduce the chance of argument. They have separate skill sets required in order to create a good story. So Post away.

    The Month's Best -

    Henry Swift - January 2013
     
    #1 Nexus, Jan 15, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 9, 2013
  2. Pignasty

    Pignasty Journeyman
    Barter Town

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    Submission for February! (or January, I spose it doesn't matter ^^)

    The Purpley Odor of Adventure!
    The day begins like any other day... With the smell of adventure wafting into my nostrils!
    ...or perhaps that's the scent of my dashing mustache?


    ...


    Nope. Adventure!

    And so, I journey to the one place I know adventure awaits, the Epicenter of Epicness, the, um.. the Awning of Awesome, the... Hub of Hubris?

    The market stalls of New Magincia! I follow that whiff of adventure up one smelly row of animal vendors, and down another row of grinning, sweating men who want to "Buy my wares", barely managing, through sheer force of gallantly mustachioed will, to track that alluring adventuresome aroma through the competing odors of spices, armpit, and beetle dung.


    And my persistence pays off! The scent comes clearer as I come closer and closer to a mounted, wand-wielding mage, the scent takes on definition, the piquant flavor of adventure I'd followed all the way here begins to coalesce. Swirling into my snuffling nostrils, it seems to take on shape and even color!

    Did you ever wonder what color the Smell of Adventure has, friends? Well, let me tell you. The Smell of Adventure is...

    Purple.

    I move closer to investigate, and there, in the pack of the horseback conjurer, I find the source. The wellspring
    of that scent I'd followed all the way here. A katana? Nay, not just any katana! A PURPLE KATANA!!

    [​IMG]

    This arrogant fellow seems not to know the value of what he carries! What does he, a spellslinger, need with a katana at all? Much less this lovely razor-sharp, aromatic, violet-hued beauty! As sometimes happens, when an item is languishing in the possession of someone who cannot fully appreciate it, this Katana calls to me!

    "Oh, Brave Henry!" it cries, "save me from the confines of this evil wizard's pack!"

    "Very well!" I respond with all the confidence I can muster from the depths of my mustache. I reach out a helping hand, and....

    [​IMG]

    The guards! On high alert, after finding a series of unattendend packhorses loaded with Explosion Potions, the city watch of New Magincia mistake my friendly gesture for one of ill intent! They introduce me first to their halberds, then to their lightning, and then to the very dirty floor of their market town, where I take an undesired (and undeserved) nap!

    I wander, in the grayscale dreamscape of Napland, until I find a kindly old man, who takes some cheap shots at my morality, and then slaps me awake. I return, as quickly as my groggy legs will carry me, to the scene of my inadvertent snooze.

    The katana-bearing mage still calmly sits his horse, seemingly unmoved by my recent bout of guard-induced narcolepsy.

    I bend and quickly gather my belongings, only to discover...

    This nefarious Ne'er-do-well has rifled my possessions! He has taken from me what was mine and stowed it in the smelly recesses of his own pack! And now, to add insult to injury, he speaks down to me from atop his mighty (smelly) steed!

    "Henry," he condescends, "if you get me a taming ring, I'll give your stuff back."

    Harumph.

    I should have known. The guards must be in the employ of this scoundrel! No wonder they so quickly unlimbered their halberds at my innocent helpful gesture. The whole thing was a setup. No good, filthy, dirty bribery and a trap for hapless, helpful Henry Swift.

    But I know this type, I've seen this kind of arrogance before. And I have an idea.

    I ride swiftly to my house and sort through a box of rings I'd collected at a recent IDOC. It isn't long before I find what I'm looking for. A ring to assist this mage with his taming (and very little else ^^). Although I quiver with rage at this extortion, I know the Bazaar Guards are in this wizard's pocket. (and not in the completely innocent way I was). My revenge must be swift and subtle if I hope to sneak it under the noses of the City Watch...

    I return to the smug wizard, a humbled grin distorting my elegant mustache.

    "I have a ring for you sir," I simper. It's important to my deception that he thinks I'm beaten.

    And as I step close enough to hand him this bauble, I take the opportunity to get a closer look inside his pestulant pack. The Purple Katana of Adventure still awaits my help, but it is, alas, much too heavy. There is no way I can liberate it from this dastardly mage (tamer?) with the eyes of his City Watch thugs so close and keen. But I do spot something else.

    [​IMG]

    A mediocre bracelet to replace the mediocre ring I'm about to hand over! Not a perfect revenge, but then, it's not a perfect world is it?

    I inspect my belongings before consenting to hand over the fruits of this wizard's extortion scheme. It's all there
    and shockingly unmolested. We make the trade, and with a little sleight of hand, a quick stumble, an innocent bump,
    and....

    [​IMG]

    The mediocre bracelet is mine! My items are now returned to my possession, and the ring this swindler blackmailed from me is now replaced with a bracelet of similar (low) value.

    "I hope we can all walk away from this having learned a lesson," he says with a condescending little smile.

    "Oh certainly!" I reply with a hearty chuckle, "and this mediocre bracelet I've just found has brightened my day! No
    hard feelings, then, eh?"

    His eyes squint, just a little, but I see it. His smile tightens, just barely, but I notice. The swindler who thought he was swindling a swindler just got counter-swindled right in front of his guards and they didn't see a thing!

    He knows he's been beaten now, and can't help but acknowledge a superior talent. He raises an eyebrow, thinking through what has just happened, and concedes defeat.

    "I could use a talent like yours" he says, and drops a small pile of gold on the ground at my feet for me to "find".

    "These yokels aren't worth what I pay them, but a man like you could really go far around here."

    "I'll give it some thought," I lie. I have no desire to be chained in the employ of a second-rate racketeer, but it wouldn't do to stir him up again, now that I have him where I want him. There's still that katana to come back for, after all.

    [​IMG]

    "Well, next time you're in town, come and talk to me about... your job." He smiles, eyes pointing quickly down to the pile of gold on the ground at my feet. The wizard rides away, thinking he's set his hooks in me, and hoping to see me return soon, begging for his employment.

    And I will return! But not for his handouts, oh no. I'll be following the scent of that lovely purple katana, waiting for a spot away from the prying eyes (and halberds) of the City Watch! Take heart, Katana. You will be free, I swear it,

    Someday, you will be free!
     
  3. Hattori Hanzo

    Hattori Hanzo Lore Keeper
    Stratics Veteran Alumni TnT/TnA

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    Is it something in the way a thief's brain is wired? I love these stories.
     
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  4. mikni

    mikni Seasoned Veteran
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    Big thief or a sorry excuse for a person?

    For me playing a thief is not about gold. There are lots of other occupations that bring in a far more reliable salary. And probably, for most people, a greater overall wealth.
    No, for me, thievery is all about the experience. The unexpected, the interaction, the chase or reaction. Stealing 120 scrolls might be good for the wallet, but if no one noticed it where is the fun? A chase and some curses can make a stolen treasure map far more valuable to me.

    Some probably think of me as a griefer, getting off on ruining other peoples gameplay. But I don't see it that way. Sure IT IS absolutely hilarious when someone goes ballistic in general chat. Tears and rage is one reaction that can be fun. In some dark and twisted way perhaps. But I enjoy it even more when people can take it with a laugh. When people say it's fun having me around, that it makes them think that extra step. I collect screenshots of both people saying they hate me and people that say they love me. I do it for the fame!


    With that said, here's a story featuring a guy that most definitely doesn't like me. Please welcome Garfield from Gilfane!

    We begin todays story shortly after I woke up for the day. After exchanging pleasantries with the neighbors I turn to patrolling the common grounds. Check for easy pickings first I say. Soon I overhear talk about an alacrity scroll that might be up for sale. Someone that wants to learn the fine art of removing traps a little faster than normal.
    This really gets my attention for several reasons. For one it's the first opportunity of the day. It is also a scroll that sells for a bit more than many other. And the person that has it is Garfield. You see, I've ran into this man before. I have stolen from him before. And he's one of the guys that will not quietly accept the loss of an item.

    [​IMG]

    With the "where to meet" question still hanging in the air I mentally ready myself. Breath in... Breath out... *cracks knuckles* Last time I met Garfield it was in Zento. I'm guessing he's like most people, a creature of habit, so I go to Zento in advance.

    [​IMG]

    But trouble brews. I'm beginning to suspect there are spies somewhere. As far as I know, no one should know that I'm awake. At least not anyone I don't trust... Maybe I'm too trusting?
    This is not the first time this happens and I make a mental note to investigate this further.

    [​IMG]

    With my cover blown and a mark that seems to understand the risks, I give up. I have no intentions to continue my pursuit at this point. Well played Garfield, well played indeed.

    [​IMG]

    But wait! Doesn't this sound like he's going to meet him there? And what harm could it do to just check it out. There might be other people down there. Or Discovery might even have something shiny in his pockets.

    [​IMG]

    When I get down to the NEW2 guild house in Magincia not a single soul is in sight. Did he mean another house? I don't know. Either way, I make a few passes around the houses. Since I'm already here and all. But what do you know? Lord Garfield is here! But for sure he does not have the scroll on him. No way!

    [​IMG]
    While chasing Garfield around a bit (he seems to remember that I heard them talk) I spot another man standing there, Eifla. And now I'm really torn, who do I follow? They go off in opposite directions...[​IMG]
    I decide to follow Garfield. Eifla looks a bit scrappy and my guess is he do not carry anything of value. Plus There is the third person left in the equation, Discovery. And maybe, just maybe, I can still get a shot at the scroll.
    Garfield runs inside the NEW house and hides. But not before I get his backpack open...

    [​IMG]

    *Gasps* There it is!

    Now I just have to wait until he moves. And I do, and he does.

    [​IMG]

    Target aquired! Now it's only the actual steal left. Er, it would be easier if you did not move around so much sir.[​IMG]



    [​IMG][​IMG]
    Finally he stops long enough for me to get in close. It's only for a second, but it's all I need. Yoink![​IMG]
    For some reason there is not a word from Garfield. For quite some time. Given past experiences with him I can't help myself from giggling at the thought of him screaming into a pillow somewhere.

    But he can not keep quiet forever.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    So am I a "big thief" or a "sorry excuse for a person"? I guess it's in the eye of the beholder. And it represents the two extremes of the spectrum of reactions that makes stealing fun for me. I do it for the fame!

    PS:
    I DO love you Garfield. I love you all! :heart:
     
    Pignasty likes this.
  5. Hattori Hanzo

    Hattori Hanzo Lore Keeper
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    Thieves are dastardly vermin who deserve eradication! Actually, I am sad because I have not recently had time to go interact with you thieving rats. I am missing all the fun!
     
  6. mikni

    mikni Seasoned Veteran
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    Anti-theft methods doesn't always work

    Sometimes people try to outsmart us thieves. But to succeed you have to be smarter than the thief. And you are probably not. Some people will claim this theft was based on luck alone, but it was not. People create their own luck I say. This theft got pulled off because of extensive behavior analysis, carried out over several months. And maybe a hint of luck, but that was my own creation, yeah that's it!

    I wake up and immediately I hear whispers about a man called VicTorii. He is apparently looking to invest in a stat scroll. Sounds awesome!

    Now where would you be if you were named VicTorii? Right, Luna bank.

    [​IMG]

    And lucky, er, smart me! Anthony wants to sell some. Oh how I hope VicTorii buys the one for 400.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Excellent question! This will be so easy... How hard can it be, stealing from a naked guy, at Luna? He doesn't strike me as the most cunning of characters. But what if he gets help with the thinking? Let's see what happens next.

    It takes Anthony some time to answer the question. Maybe he too lacks some grey matter and can't remember if he has a vendor or not? MY guess is, if have one it will be in Magincia. So I start walking down there.

    [​IMG]

    Oh, looks like I was wrong for once. But fear not fans, Zento is not far! And in a blink of an eye I'm there. Even before VicTorii got the time to answer.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Oh, gee, thanks Tizarium! But anyway, incoming VicTorii. I can already smell him, it, or whatever. ^^

    I really don't get this next advice. Can't trade while hidden, Anthony already named the location and now Tyrath does it again? But no time to wonder about that, here comes the GIL!

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    I was expecting Anthony and here comes Aurora? Not even the right gender. Coincidence? Might be. But on the other hand, GIL and carelessly strewn scrolls go hand in hand. So in for a snoop I go... She hides! Clever girl. But I wasn't looking for you anyway, I got a date with Anthony!

    Err, where are you going?!

    [​IMG]

    Maybe Aurora and Anthony is the same person? In some transgender kind of way mayhaps? Their names both start with an A... Must be so! And you clever, clever girl.. man... you! You invited VicTorii to a party didn't you? You told him to run to your secret meeting place didn't you? Where all the scroll trading and cuddling will take place. And you never thought about inviting me!

    But I get a track up and follow anyway.

    [​IMG]

    Don't run to the gate... Don't run to the gate. Don't run to the gate!!

    [​IMG]

    ARGH!

    OK, but we will do this. Think, think, think... GIL + buyer on foot + general silliness = Magincia. Tada!

    [​IMG]

    See? I'm smart, not lucky. Now I lost him in the woods. But that's not a problem either. There is only one house they can be at. Tada!

    [​IMG]

    And there is the third GIL. Or the second impersonation of the first. Never mind. With Hoffs, a front figure in GIL, standing at their scroll vendor and Victorii impatiently waiting in front of it my fingers really start itching. Please be the 400k scroll!

    The only thing left to do is position myself right behind VicTorii, get a target cursor up and wait for him to make the buy. And I do, and he does.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Here I have no idea what it is, just a white scroll. I do hope it was the +20 stat and not a 105 that he decided to buy first. Let's take a look when things cool down a little bit.

    [​IMG]

    SUCCESS!!
     
  7. mikni

    mikni Seasoned Veteran
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    A lazy day with time to spare

    Sometimes I like to go visit the elves in Heartwood. The thought of runic kits lures me easily. Pretty often you find someone there, working for an elf. Pretty much always they carry lots of bags with only junk in them. And I usually don't have the patience to stand around for long. But today I decided to do just that. "Nothing better to do anyways" I thought.

    After climbing up the tree I noticed Artimus from TDO* standing by the fletchers. I'm not sure but I seem to recall the guild TDO from a long time ago. In any case, lately they have popped up all over the place. Many of them seem to be crafters, like this one.

    [​IMG]

    I stand around for some time, watching Artimus craft bows, hand them over to the elf, get some kind of "reward" and repeat. He also runs out of wood a few times and leave to gather more. It's really dull and I'm half asleep, just barely noticing any new backpacks he gets. He's also pretty slow with the crafting, not helping...

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    But suddenly!

    A jolt goes through my body and I'm wide awake. An ash runic kit! As a matter of fact I recently saw one on a vendor for a pretty good pile of gold.

    [​IMG]

    Now is the time to act quickly. Seems pretty clear that if Artimus notices what he got he'll make a run for it. Can't have that, I've waited a long time on this kit! So, down with my hand in his backpack. And with a firm *yoink* I grab it.

    [​IMG]

    It's mine! And I don't think Artimus has a clue he lost anything. He still stands there, crafting new bows for the elf. If he didn't even knew he had it he can't be mad at me, right? ^^

    [​IMG]
     
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  8. mikni

    mikni Seasoned Veteran
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    My plan is to win on quantity this month!
     
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  9. mikni

    mikni Seasoned Veteran
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    Did it work?
     
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  10. startle

    startle Siege... Where the fun begins.
    Stratics Veteran Stratics Legend Gilfane

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    :hahaha: Works for me...