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The Night before Christmas

Discussion in 'UHall' started by hawkeye_pike, Dec 25, 2008.

  1. hawkeye_pike

    hawkeye_pike Babbling Loonie
    Stratics Veteran

    May 15, 2008
    Likes Received:
    The Night before Christmas in Felucca

    T'was the night before Christmas when all through the shard
    Not a creature was stirring, 'cept a macroing bard.
    The backpacks were hung by the chimney with care
    In hopes generous GMs soon would be there.

    The bank thieves were nestled all snug in their robes
    While visions of easy marks danced in their lobes.
    All of us regulars had started to yawn
    We had just settled down, and waited till dawn.

    When out on the lawn there arose such a scream.
    Everyone looked 'round, to scope out the scene.
    Away to the front door, we flew like a flash
    'Twas just in time for a halberd's last crash.

    The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow
    Shone red from the blood of the newbie below.
    Then, what should our wondering eyes thus impart?
    But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny great harts!

    With white-bearded driver, all dressed in red,
    The same as the name floating o'er his head,
    He bent over the corpse, started carving away.
    We knew in a moment, IT WAS SANTA PK!!!

    Our numbers were many, our characters brave.
    We all jumped on Santa PK in a wave!
    More rapid than eagles, his great harts they came.
    Santa PK cursed soundly, then called them by name.

    Now Corp Por, now Vas Flam, now on Vas Ort Grav!
    Now Ort Sanct, now Wis Quas, and others I have!
    To the top of the hedge, to the top of the wall,
    Rel Por away, por away, por away all!

    And then, in a twinkling, we heard on the roof
    The thumping and whumping of each little hoof.
    We all headed inside, and as we turned round
    Down the chimney came Santa PK with a bound.

    Dressed in red magic plate, from his head to his foot,
    He chopped down our tree, and then stole the rule-book.
    He snooped all the guild mates, and summoned EVs,
    Then stole all 15 of my insured boat keys!

    His dimples, how merry! His twinkling eye!
    He looked 'round, then said, "U R all gonna die!"
    Then with no more words he went straight to his work;
    To make us all take unplanned naps in the dirt.

    I whipped out my kryss, as all followed suit.
    We were hungry for Santa PK's blood and loot.
    He had sullied our home, brought us nothing but grief!
    He was worse than a Yew-Gate-PK or a thief!

    My kryss, it whooshed, my kryss, it whiffed!
    I couldn't hit Santa PK, I was all miffed!
    My fellow guild mates hurled their arrows and spells
    But they all missed Santa PK just as well.

    His casting was swift, his footwork sublime.
    Three bolts he could put in the air at one time!
    He guzzed Gheals with 1 second's delay,
    And I wondered, "Now why can't *I* do it that way?"

    The light bulb went on, I let out a scream.
    "This cheater must utilize speedhacks, he's mean!"
    Santa PK turned his head 'round my way.
    "Corp Por" *thwack* "Corp Por", all I then saw was gray.

    As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly
    Flew the bodies of guild mates, those doomed to die.
    And then, when he was the last one left standing
    Santa PK ran forthwith to the landing.

    He gathered our heads, and he gathered our loot
    He jumped in his sleigh in his red armor suit.
    As he drove out of sight, I heard him exclaim
    "Man, U guys suk! U guys R all LaM3!"
  2. Surgeries

    Surgeries Grand Poobah
    Stratics Veteran Stratics Legend

    Mar 18, 2004
    Likes Received:
    Wow, Hawkeye...that is a Keeper!!

    Nicely done, if you wrote it, and nicely done, if you put it up for all of us! Thanks!!

    Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays/Have a Great <Insert Appropriate Holiday Here> to you, too!

    That was too cute!:hahaha:
  3. Exgirlfriend

    Exgirlfriend Journeyman
    Stratics Veteran

    Aug 3, 2008
    Likes Received:
    Nice one...merry x-mas
  4. J0KING

    J0KING Guest

    Very nicely done!!!

    Merry Christmas!!!
  5. natfbrazil

    natfbrazil Guest

    Very nice, Thanks Hawkeye :bowdown:
  6. Tom_Builder

    Tom_Builder Slightly Crazed
    Stratics Veteran

    Dec 9, 2002
    Likes Received:
    Great Job!!! I loved it!
  7. christy1221

    christy1221 Slightly Crazed
    Stratics Veteran

    May 12, 2008
    Likes Received:
  8. Infiniti

    Infiniti Guest

    Awesome, simply awesome. Loved it! Merry Christmas to you Hawkeye. :hug:
  9. That was a pleasure to read!! Good job!!
  10. Sytherea

    Sytherea Guest

    That was too good! I'm putting that in my Christmas library! :hahaha:
  11. mycenaen

    mycenaen Guest

    awesome!!!!! :) :) :)