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An Imp Story

Discussion in 'UO White Stag Inn' started by Guest, Jun 13, 2004.

  1. Guest

    Guest Guest

    Hello everyone. I usually write stories about my characters, but with this story I have gone the extra mile and have written a tale just about my Mage's pet imps. A few references in the story might only be known to Sonoma players, but I hope it's still enjoyable. Without a do, I give you An Imp Story. /php-bin/shared/images/icons/smile.gif


    Guldan had just finished training his white wyrm, Irae, and was quite tired from the day's activities. Bandaging a large wyrm for more than 200 times in a given time can easily wear out a mage who has less than average stamina. Walking into his lair, Battler perched upon his shoulder. Guldan pat him the head, gave him a treat, and continued to walk deeper in where Hadriel the drake, Saibot the nightmare, and Anubris the frenzied ostard were waiting. He spent some time with his creatures, fed them, and continued towards his bedroom.

    Battler: Did Irae's training go well, Master?
    Guldan: Yes it did, my minion. This creature is far more powerful than I could imagine. Perhaps I should train wyrms from now on.
    Battler: B..b..but what about us, Master?

    Guldan pat Battler on the head again.

    Guldan: No need to worry, Battler. You've always been a loyal servant to me. Now as for Duma..
    Battler: Oh please don't abandon him, Master! He might be a trickster, but he's the only family I've got!
    Guldan: Of course.. how could I forget?

    Guldan reached the door of his bedroom where the reckless imp, Duma, was waiting. He had a huge smirk on his face, and his claws were stretched outward.

    Guldan: Duma, did you prepare my bedroom as I asked?
    Duma: Oh yeah, Boss. I got the whole thing all worked out. Bed's all made, and all that.
    Guldan: And the reagents.. did you organize them as I asked?
    Duma: Sure, Boss! Like I said, everything's taken care of.


    Guldan: Good, good. You've done well for once, Duma.

    Duma smirked widely and outstretched his claws even more.

    Duma: Did you get me any of those cookies, Boss? I love 'em to death!
    Guldan: No. There wasn't enough time for anything like that. Irae's training had to be done.
    Duma: C'mon, Boss! I did all that stuff for ya. Didn't ya get me anything?

    Guldan chuckled to himself and threw a huge fish into Duma's claws, nearly knocking him over. The overweight imp quickly devoured the raw fish and spit the bones out all in less than 10 seconds.

    Duma: C'mon, Boss! All's I need are some of those cookies.
    Guldan: Perhaps in the morning, Duma. I'm tired this eve.
    Duma: Alright! Thanks a lot, Boss! I knew I could count on ya! What a great guy, and handsome too!

    Guldan shrugged and walked into his bedroom. Everything seemed normal to his eyes and with a snap of his fingers, Battler descended his master's shoulder and fluttered to the ground next to Duma. Guldan slid off his ancient robe, placed it on the wall, removed his armor, changed into some pants, and got into bed.

    Battler: Goodnight, Master. If there's anything you may need, please ask.
    Duma: Yeah, and don't forget those cookies tomorrow!

    Guldan chuckled to himself and closed his eyes. Duma and Battler left the room.

    Battler: I hope the master is adjusting to this new lair. It isn't as comfortable as his old one.
    Duma: Yeah, yeah, yeah. At least he ain't worked to death like us.
    Battler: I don't think we're worked to death.
    Duma: Yeah, you ain't. He just loooves you, Battler. What's with that?
    Battler: Maybe you should quit acting like a joker. Master has no tolerance for that.
    Duma: Hah! That sooo would be bad if I offended HIM. I mean, he just stays out all day and lets us take care of all the chores. That stupid ostard of his bites too much, and that Hadriel has his greedy teeth fixed on me.
    Battler: Well you would make a nice meal.. I mean you are sort of "plump" for an imp.
    Duma: Yeah yeah yeah.. well I just wish I could get a little respect around here, ya know? It ain't fair how he treats me!
    Battler: Without him we'd probably just be another corpse in the desert. He did rescue us long ago, and ever since that hag sent everyone out for imps, I've been scared to leave the master's side.
    Duma: Come on, Battler! Don't you want to stand out instead of being on his shoulder? C'mon!
    Battler: What do you have planned anyways?

    Duma opened the bedroom door just a bit and pointed towards Guldan's robe.

    Battler: You've got to be kidding, Duma. The master values that robe with his life. Didn't he earn it after training with powerful mages in Felucca long ago?
    Duma: But look, Battler. That robe's rare, and everyone knows that rich people got rare stuff. Just think of how good it'll be to have people stop and check us out cause of that robe.
    Battler: You'd think two talking imps would do that enough.. hrm.. maybe we should get a nice blaze colored robe and imitate those humans by the bank..
    Duma: Quit being so arrogant! Sure we can talk, but without the power who cares? I say we take that robe.
    Battler: The master won't appreciate that. He'd probably feed us to that wyrm... by the way, did you really organize his reagent chest?
    Duma: C'mon, Battler. Let's just borrow that robe for tonight and return it before morning. He won't notice a thing! Trust me on this one!
    Battler: I can't allow that, Duma.

    Battler stood infront of the door with pride. He stretched his arms as long as they could go across the door and glared. Duma simply shoved the smaller imp out of the way and went inside. After a few minutes he came out wearing the robe which looked as if he was wearing a tent.

    Duma: Hahaha! Look at me, Battler! Check out this robe. I look like an Imp Lord, don't I?
    Battler: No.. no you don't.
    Duma: Hmmm.. you're right. I'm the Imp King!
    Battler: That's good, Duma.. that's good. Well, I'll just go tell Master about all this and you can get caged up.
    Duma: Hah! You think it's that easy! We're partners in this now! You tell the boss about this, and I'll just tell him you helped.
    Battler: He won't believe you.
    Duma: You think so? You said yourself he valued it with his life, rrright? He's gonna be mad if he finds out about this.
    Battler: Fine.. you win. The robe had better be placed back on the wall by tomorrow morning, or he'll be incredibly angry.
    Duma: Yeah, yeah, yeah.. so where do you wanna go first, servant.
    Battler: Wh..what? Servant?
    Duma: I can't walk with this thing! It's draggin' the floor. You'd better hold it for me like a servant should treat a king.
    Battler: Master would be even more angry if he found out the robe was dirty... fine, I guess.
    Duma: So where we gonna go anyways?
    Battler: I have no clue. This is a really stupid idea.
    Duma: Yeah, yeah, yeah.. I know. Say! Let's see if we can get some ladies.
    Battler: I doubt any human woman is going to find us attractive.
    Duma: You idiot! Not humans.. we gotta find some imp girls.
    Battler: Now where will we find those? You aren't very good at planning, Duma.
    Duma: Aha! Let's go to that desert where the boss found us.
    Battler: And you are sure this is a good idea?
    Duma: Of course! Ya gotta have some faith in me.

    With a few waves of his hand, Duma the Imp King opened up a magic portal to the desert lands of the lost lands. As they arrived, they noticed the area to be devoid of imps. They ventured forth as the reluctant Battler held the robe for Duma.

    Battler: How did you open that portal?
    Duma: Ah, well.. let's just say I didn't just take the boss' robe.
    Battler: What did you take...?
    Duma: Wellll.. it was gonna be boring to walk all this way.. so I snagged this.

    Duma held up one of Guldan's best runebooks with pride.

    Battler: Master's going to kill us!
    Duma: Not if we don't give it back to him, idiot! Come on, let's go!

    Duma the Imp King and his loyal servant Battler traveled through the large desert which seemed to be devoid of all life. Not even the usually irritating scorpions or the strange venomous wyverns were to be seen. Battler didn't know what to do, but he did know that if Guldan's robe was dirty there would be dire consequences. He bit his lip, held it oddly with his claws, and pressed on. Eventually they saw a very beautiful female imp (as beautiful as imps can be anyways).


    Duma: Whoah! Check her out, Battler.
    Battler: Hmm.. yes. She is quite beautiful, but we don't have time for this.
    Duma: Ah, you idiot! We got all the time in the world! Hey there, cutie! C'mon over here!

    The female imp blinked and continued to flutter around.

    Duma: Whoah whoah.. what's the matter?
    Battler: ...Maybe you aren't her type.
    Duma: Nah.. that ain't it. Hey, don't you know who I am?! I am the King! King of the Imps! Muwahahaha! Behold my wonderful nightmare colored robe! Gaze upon my powerful runebook!
    Battler: Such a liar..
    Duma: You be quiet, Batt... err.. Servant! Yes! Behold for I have a servant which makes me a king... right?

    The imp just fluttered around and started to dig in the sand.

    Duma: Hey! You get over here?! Can't you tell when Imp royalty is around?!
    Battler: Maybe she can't talk..
    Duma: Oh geez.. it figures. Say, how do imps talk again?
    Battler: Don't ask me.. I can't remember.
    Duma: GAHHH!! This ain't gonna work, Battler.
    Battler: As I said earlier. Now let's go home..

    The pink imp then looked Duma's way.

    Duma: Haha! See! She's comin' around.
    Battler: Are you sure about that?

    It then squeaked in terror and flew off quickly.

    Duma: Hah! Amazed by my might, eh? I can't blame ya.

    Battler turned around and sighed. He gently tugged on the robe.

    Duma: What'dya want, Battler? I'm tryin' to think.
    Battler: You'd better look over here..

    Duma turned around and his eyes opened up widely. A small party of adventurers was closing in on them.


    Mage: woot! found sum!
    Macer: hehe
    Warrior: bout time we found sum imps

    Duma and Battler looked at each other puzzled.

    Duma: They're with the hag! Better make tracks!

    The two quickly ran off as fast as they could.

    Duma: Gah! What bad luck. This is all your fault!
    Battler: My fault?! It was your idea!
    Duma: Yeah yeah, well they probably saw you first!
    Battler: You're the fat one!
    Duma: Shut up, Battler! We gotta find something to do now.
    Battler: Hmm.. we could go back home?
    Duma: Nah, I bet we could do something so brave that Boss'll always look up to us!
    Battler: And what idiot idea is this?
    Duma: Eheheh.. come with me, Servant.

    The two imps, King Duma and his lowly servant, Battler, ventured to the land of Ilshenar near the shrine of Spirituality. They quickly dodged past skeletal knights and savage imps until they arrived at the Blood Dungeon.

    Battler: And what are we doing here? The master has never taken us here before.
    Duma: Eheheh! Exactly! We're gonna one-up the boss!
    Battler: Hrm.. how exactly?
    Duma: We're gonna go and kill that big daemon that lives here.
    Battler: You... you mean a Balron?
    Duma: Yeah! That's the name! We're gonna show the boss who's the most powerful!
    Battler: You can't be serious! The Balron can't fall to two imps!
    Duma: Eehehhe.. you're right, Servant. It's gonna fall to the KING of the Imps! Muwahaah!
    Battler: You seriously have lost your mind, Duma..

    The two then managed to sneak their way past a few dangerous creatures and came upon the lair of the infamous Balron.


    Balron: Fools! I shall crush you!
    Duma: Bring it on, you stupid daemon! You're messin' with the IMP KING!
    Battler: This is too much.. I'm out of here.
    Duma: What?! Come back, you coward!

    Battler ran out of the Blood Dungeon as fast as his legs could take him, leaving the hapless Duma behind.

    Duma: Err... uhhh.. err.. fear the Imp King?

    The Balron chuckled and unleashed a powerful fireball without haste.

    Duma struggled back towards Guldan's lair. He realized that dawn was soon approaching, but charred to a crisp, he couldn't do very much about it. The robe itself had been charred, but not to the point of ruin. In a daze, he began to talk to himself.

    Duma: *hack* Looks like the Boss ain't gonna be that mad after all. Hah! This stupid robe couldn't even protect me from a little fireball! It ain't worth the time of the Imp King!

    After finally arriving at Guldan's lair, he was met with a surprise.


    Guldan: So, Duma.. you decided to take my priceless robe in the middle of the night?

    Battler snickered on Guldan's shoulder.

    Duma: Uhh Boss.. umm.. I can explain! See, I was gonna get it washed, ya know? All nice and clean, but uhh.. some gypsies came and, well you know how they are.. savages I say!

    Guldan pat Battler on the head.

    Guldan: Oh, thank you so much, Duma. I didn't realize there were washerwomen in the Blood Dungeon. You'll have to show me sometime..

    Duma made a big grin as the sarcasm slipped by him.

    Duma: Oh yeah, Boss! I'll show ya sometime!
    Guldan: But it was so unfortunate that my robe was damaged. Perhaps you could be kind and work to pay me back?
    Duma: Oh yeah, Boss.. uhh.. whatever you say.

    A few hours later...


    Battler: Back to work, Duma! That robe repair isn't going to be cheap! On the double!
    Duma: Yeah, yeah, yeah..

    Battler produced a small bag from his side and nibbled on the contents inside.

    Duma: Uhh.. what's that ya got there, Brother?
    Battler: Oh, just some fresh cookies.

    The End
  2. Option

    Option Guest

    Hehe... aside from the graphics, I like it.
  3. Lord Kishkuman

    Stratics Veteran

    Feb 25, 2004
    Likes Received:
    I kinda liked the pictures. Just something new a different.
  4. Option

    Option Guest

    I like the pictures; I don't like the graphics on the pictures.