You're standing quietly at the bank, staring off into space. Suddenly, you feel a cannon ball hit your knees. You stagger, but maintain your balance and look down. Big green eyes look up at you and a squeaky goblin voice says, "Arp! Cidur and I learns how to setting things on fire!" ~*~*~*~*~*~ Join Zox Greatsnapper and Cidur Klomp for an Autumn Bonfire on Friday, September 30th, at 8 p.m. CDT, at the Skara Brae Fairgrounds (47° 1′S, 36° 0′W). Fire Fish Weigh-In Bring your heaviest fire fish, caught between September 27th and 30th. It must not be mounted. If it does not win, you may have it back. Bessie Bingo Which square will be Bessie's last? See the glorious final moments of a speeding cow. Autumn Archery Oak Division: 100.1-120 skill Acorn Division: 0-100 skill Wild Goose Chase Slay the killer geese and take their delicious gooseberry jam. Whoever brings back the most will be proclaimed Harvest King or Harvest Queen! Oddly-Shaped Squash Showcase Search your garden or the local fields and bring us the strangest squash, gourd, melon, carrot, or onion of this year's crop. Spin a yarn about why it's so funny-looking. If you can't find anything, stop by the farmer in Skara or Britain and ask if he's got anything to tickle your fancy.