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Discussion in 'UO Chesapeake' started by whiterabbit, Aug 12, 2015.
THIS IS FOR FUNS
WE ALL KNOW THESE ARE NOT TRUE
GUYS COMES INTO DA ROOM
FINDS A BLONDE STANDING ON LIL STOOL WIF ROPE AROUND HERZ ANKLES. UDDER END OB DA ROPE TIED TO CIELING FAN.
HIMZ ASK WTH?
BLONDE SAY HERZ KILLIN HERZ SELF
GUY ASKS WOODNT IT BEEES BETTER IF ROPE WAS AROUND HERZ NECK?
BLONDE SAY I TRIED DAT, I COULDNT BREATHE
Q: How many blondes does it take to eat a squirrel?
A: Three. One to eat it... and two to watch for cars.
How many goblins does it take to bake a pie?
Dunno... they keep goblin' up all the ingredients.
The Smart Blonde
A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer.
She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the
loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce.
The car is parked on the street in front of the bank,
she has the title and everything checks out.
The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.
The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the
blonde for using a $250,000 Rolls as collateral against a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drives the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the
interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled.
We checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.
What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The blonde replies..... "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"
What is the difference between a blonde in a tight dress lying in the street and a lawyer clutching a briefcase lying in the street?
There are skid marks in front of the blonde.
Disclaimer: The blonde evidently wasn't very smart. The lawyer evidently wasn't any smarter than the blonde. Was the driver smart? The jury is still out on that one.