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When All Else Fails

Discussion in 'UO Catskills Role Play' started by Aedon Durreah, Nov 18, 2015.

  1. Aedon Durreah

    Aedon Durreah Village of Aegis
    Stratics Veteran

    Jun 2, 2008
    Likes Received:
    I will admit readily that my understanding of females is limited to yes dear, no dear. But I am more than a bit confused at Dramora’s seeming desire to throw herself at danger. It was silly enough that she allowed herself to be drawn to a meeting far removed from other folks. But at least, I thought, Judas would be with her. Coming back and finding him sitting out front on a bench I assumed she was inside. But when I asked Judas if Dramora was inside, he said no.

    I could hardly believe that he had left her alone with Penrose somewhere in the Spiritwood. He had to know that the man was a danger to Dramora. And even if he was not a man given to fighting, he should have remained with her, or at the very least urged her to return to Aegis with him.

    But I do not blame Judas for what he did really. Dramora is a head strong woman who seems to cringe at the idea that a man would wish to look after her, and keep her somewhat safe. She stormed out of the Rest with Judas close at her heals.

    I went hunting; it is for me a way to clear my mind and ease what is left of my shattered nerves. It is not the random killing of creatures in the Glade that helps me achieve some measure of serenity, but the sight and smells of the forest greenery.

    I did not ride long before I sheathed my sword and took to the foot paths of Yew. These walkways have been for many years etched in my memories. They are an ever present part of my hopes and dreams. To be able to do as once I could-and simply enjoy the nearness of the trees. Pine, poplar and Yew trees line the walkways which I have often trod between what was once Everthorne and Icefall and the steps of the Knights Rest. It is in the forest that I find life and meaning to my life. And though I know it may be a bit selfish of me, it is not often that I invite others inside my world hoping that they will see and feel the things I do.

    Walking those paths, and breathing in the scent of pine as I listen to the foxes shuffle through the rapidly falling leaves I cannot long retain my anger. But my concern for one whose life has become intertwined with mine on many levels does not diminish. And so, with calmer thoughts I turn myself down the path that leads to Aegis.

    As I knocked on Dramora’s door I tried to sort out what words I would use to speak to her. But words well thought out rarely serve to convey the meanings we often wish to impart. And my words often fail me when I need them most. In other words, the talk did not go well. At one point she even mentioned that she was thinking of heading back home and to my surprise I told her perhaps she should.

    It is not that I wish to see her leave. It has been nice having someone around that remembers many of the people and times that I do. We have had many enjoyable talks about Jan, Beleg, Alyssia, The Guardians of Virtue, Azreal and well many others who will forever live in my mind and heart. And though I would never tell her this, other than James she is the person I find I am closest to these days.

    But if her going home will keep her safe, and I can know she is living a restful life back on her farm, then I can be content with tending the Rest and going on an occasional hunt or visiting Ques tavern or the Shattered Skull.

    It was I who originally placed her in danger in the first place. What was I thinking calling her back to face Mikael and the Hand? And then beyond that there was the book. Had I not shown her the accursed thing, she would never have some under Penrose’s gaze.

    One can easily look back with great clarity. It is always the future which is shrouded in mist. The one thing I know above all things is that Dramora among others see me as incapable of defending that which matters to me. Perhaps I have played the fool too often, or tried too hard to be the nice guy. But swaggering, bragging and sword swinging have never defined what I am. Tomorrow I will speak to Dramora once again; perhaps the night will have eased some of the tensions which lie between us. But if she is determined to leave Aegis and return to her home, I will not seek to stop her.

    But I will miss her.
  2. Dramora

    Dramora Journeyman
    Stratics Veteran

    May 12, 2008
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    The night started out as any other night. How was she to know the evening would take a very odd turn?

    Dramora went to the Rest to see what needed to be restocked, as she had every other night for the past several weeks. Tonite, however, Judas was waiting for her.

    Since it was still early in the evening, she was surprised to see him.

    He explained that he was there to accompany her to a meeting with Penrose that was set up for her by Aedon. She was upset that Aedon had set up a meeting without bothering to ask her, but she was also upset that the only thing Judas seemed to care about was how she was dressed! He didn’t seem to care that Penrose was dangerous, and she was going to meet with him.

    When she told Judas she needed to be fully armored if she was to meet with Penrose, he assured her the outfit he had given her had been magically enhanced to make sure she was well protected, even though it didn’t look like it was.

    When Penrose arrived, he asked that she come with him elsewhere. Although she knew it was probably not the smartest move on her part, the fact that Judas was with her caused her to agree. Penrose opened a gate and the three went through.

    Upon seeing that he was standing in Spiritwood, Judas immediately requested Penrose move the meeting elsewhere. Penrose refused and when he went into the building to prepare the meeting room, Judas turned and told Dramora he couldn’t be in Spiritwood. Something about the Rangers, and he wasn’t welcome there. She informed him if he needed to leave he should, but it was up to him whether he stayed or left. He chose to leave. She chose to stay, which was the second of a long line of stupid things she did that night.

    Dramora was still not sure why Penrose wanted to talk to her, and alone. What he said to her could have been said at the Rest. The only reason she could think of, besides the obvious of trying to kill her, was to find out if she was trusting, or stupid, enough to put herself into a potentially dangerous situation.

    He said that he wanted to tell her that he no longer sought the Book of Charnadis; a statement that she just refused to believe. She informed him this was a good thing, since Aedon could no longer find the book, a fact that he still did not believe. Then he said perhaps the oddest words he spoke all night. He told her she was a “worthy associate”, whatever that meant, and that Aedon was the weaker of her group.

    Perhaps her need to defend her friend caused her to make her third mistake of the night. And defend him she did! She informed Penrose that Aedon’s show of weakness was an act…that he was far from weak. She wasn’t sure if his twitch was a reaction to the information she had just given him, or one of his many twitches. However, she knew the minute she said the words, that it was a mistake to give this man anything, even the smallest bit of worthless information.

    And the only thing she felt she did right during the entire conversation, was her response to his question about her relationship with Clive. She refused to give him any information at all about her relationship with Clive, which was clearly not the response he was looking for…his whole demeanor changed.

    Shortly after that, he opened a gate back to the Rest.

    What she found at the Rest, was as odd as the rest of the evening.

    A flurry of activity met her… Aedon berating Judas for not staying with her; the group trying to figure out where Penrose had taken her.

    She stepped into the Rest with the group hot on her heels, Aedon clearly angry.

    She’d tried to tell Aedon what had happened with her meeting with Penrose, but he stormed out.

    Dramora now sat on her couch thinking about Aedon’s hurtful words to her… about the fact he believed she could no longer take care of herself. The truth was, she was not as young as she used to be, and her reflexes had gotten slower. But, she was a warrior, and the muscle memory hadn’t gone away. If she was to die, it would be defending what was important to her. And that would be HER choice, not Aedon’s or anyone else’s!

    She angrily brushed at the tears that seemed to course down her cheeks.

    “Do not be a girl.” Aedon had said.

    The fact is, she WAS a girl. And someone she considered a good friend had hurt her; had yelled at her for following what she believed was right. She had a right to be upset and angry.

    Looking around at the disarray in her living room, the crates she had started to pack, she wondered if this was it, the end of her life in Yew. She’d told both Judas and Aedon she was leaving, going home; she was no longer needed in Yew, nor did she feel she was even wanted.

    Judas clearly wanted her to stay, Aedon however, had told her to leave.

    She also wondered if this would be the last and biggest mistake she made this night.

    She was unsure if she would even bother to speak with Aedon before she left, but she would leave a note on the bar in the Rest, along with the satchel containing the armor Judas had given her. She wished she could say good bye to him, but, a note would have to suffice.

    Perhaps this would be the start of some new adventure.

    Mistress of Virtue
    Guardians of Virtue (GV)
    Aedon Durreah likes this.
  3. Aedon Durreah

    Aedon Durreah Village of Aegis
    Stratics Veteran

    Jun 2, 2008
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    I have never been good at goodbyes. Perhaps that is why I have for so long worked hard at not allowing people to become too close to me. With Jan and Kylee I was much more than a failure, I was a miserable failure who lacked the ability to tell them how much the mean to me. The result has been my long standing separation in time and space from my family and my continued lie of working hard so I can go home to be with them. The truth of the matter is I am not sure that if I returned home I would be welcome or wanted.

    My heart and mind has become a vast labyrinth of closed off emotions and denied feelings. Not a healthy thing perhaps, but for me it is an odd safety net that keeps me from falling too fast or hard. I let few within these days, because I fear that the mask I wear will be stripped away laying bare any semblance of true feelings. No man is an island that is something we have always believed to be true. But around the small eyot of my life I have built a mighty wall of illusions and half truths, and within I have felt at least a small measure of security.

    Aegis has for years been my refuge. That spot in which I can hide out from the world and live out my sad little life. And when my time comes, as that time will come for us all, I will be laid to my long sleep beneath a tree. There will be no marker, no stone to announce that once I walked these paths. I know now that I am here, and for now that is sufficient.

    I know I should tell her I am sorry, and that I only snapped at her because I care about what happens to her. But I fear that it is not within me to do so any longer. Nor would I wish to further endanger her life and well being for the sake of..

    I have seen the way James looks at me. I am almost certain that were he of wilder temper he would have set me ablaze. I think though that he alone knows my way of thinking theses days. That is not to say he approves of the way I am so much as he understands what I am really feeling.

    There was for us all a brief respite tonight when Anfalas showed up at the Rest. He had felt that something was amiss in the Glade, and I introduced him to Dramora thinking perhaps he could help her understand the danger the book brought. He had after all lost much to the Cult of Charnadis. After speaking for a while it was decided that Anfalas could try to destroy the cursed tome. I had high hopes that he could do so, but in the end the book seemed to fight back, hurling Anfalas into a tree and knocking Dramora, myself and James back a few steps.

    I will try again tomorrow with words of duty and some measure of guile to get her to stay. But should she still be of the mind to leave, I will not try to force her to remain in Aegis. The one thing I am certain of is that she should not attempt to take that book with her. Let it lie where it does for now. Perhaps we will in time figure out a way to destroy it, or at the very least send it into the deep recesses of the earth where it can be lost to time.

    If I were a different sort of man, perhaps my life would have been easier. If I could have been a farmer, ranger or a simple shop keeper I might have been able to find and hold onto some measure of lasting happiness. But I am what time and trials have made me, and though I have tried to be more than my circumstances have allowed, I am still simply Aedon.
    #3 Aedon Durreah, Nov 19, 2015
    Last edited: Nov 20, 2015